Cry for help
by Laurashley
Summary: Catherine needed her best friend, but where was he?


Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended.  
  
A/N: Haven't seen the third season. This is just loosely based on what happened in that season. I apologize if it is confusing and contradicts what really happened in the show.  
  
Catherine didn't know what was happening to her.  
  
Maybe she was not meant to have an easy life. The first half of it had certainly not been easy. Being a stripper, the nasty coke habit and an abusive husband among others.  
  
She thought all that was behind her when Eddie left her and she made it up the ranks as a CSI. And having Lindsey to come home to was very comforting.  
  
All had been going along quite well, until Eddie died.  
  
It was not like she was still in love with him, but to tell the truth, she had loved this man once, before she had lost him to the drugs and the alcohol. She may not love him anymore, but she still cared.  
  
His death had shattered Catherine. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. She lost it. She started to unravel at the ends.  
  
Lindsey missed her father and was showing signs of depression. Catherine did not know how to help her daughter. Perhaps it was time to seek professional help. Catherine's heart broke at the sight of her daughter crying silently in her bed when she thought Catherine wasn't looking, as she did not want to worry her mother. But Catherine had heard her little girl cry for her father.  
  
At work, her home away from home and her port in the storm, everything was not going well. Catherine's actions had caused an explosion that injured her co-workers and caused damage to the labs and compromised evidence. That had caused her to be suspended for a few days.  
  
Catherine did not know how to handle all that had happened. It was starting to overwhelm her, the burden becoming too much for her to bear alone. But there was no one to be there for her. No one to understand what she was going through.  
  
She was tempted to start drinking again, a habit that she had long outgrown, but couldn't do it when she thought of Lindsey. She had already lost her father, Catherine could not let her be an orphan just because of her own selfishness. She had to be strong, for her daughter.  
  
Catherine desperately wanted to talk to someone, needed someone to reassure her that everything would be all right, that time would heal all wounds and life would go on as usual. She needed a friend.  
  
But her best friend had been retreating into himself the past few months, even before Eddie's death. They didn't talk much any more, and she did not know what was bothering him. Their friendship was a long-standing one, and they understood each other better than anyone else. She knew something was bothering him, and had confronted him about it, but he had refused to talk about it, so she had left him alone.  
  
After that, he had started shutting her out, to the extent of minimizing the times they worked together. It had become so obvious that he was trying to avoid being with her that the others had commented on it.  
  
That had hurt, and after that, nothing was the same anymore.  
  
Catherine was wondering what she had done wrong to deserve all this. She had worked very hard to put her past behind her, to be a better person. Now she was questioning herself, asking if it was worth it. Except for Lindsey, she had nothing else to live for.  
  
She had lost her ex-husband, her best friend, and to top it all off, her abilities as her CSI were being questioned. Her future was uncertain.  
  
Maybe it would be better if she left Vegas. But where could she go? She had lived here for the past 20 years of her life. What could she do? Who would want to hire a former stripper and a disgraced CSI, even if she was from one of the best crime labs in the country?  
  
Catherine couldn't think anymore. She was having a bad headache. She was slumped lifelessly on the sofa when her doorbell rang.  
  
'Catherine? It's me. Open the door please.'  
  
Catherine sighed, wondering if he was here to tell her that she had lost her job.  
  
Grissom was shocked when she opened the door to him. Catherine looked tired and lost. Her hair was uncombed and there were bags under her eyes. Her clothes were crumpled and looked like they had been slept in. This was such a far cry from the normally immaculate Catherine who was rather particular about her appearance.  
  
But her appearance was not what shocked Grissom most. It was her eyes, those windows to the soul that betrayed what the tired-looking blonde was going through. They gave Grissom a glimpse of what was going on with his best friend. Her eyes were no longer twinkling with laughter and looked lifeless, drained of all emotion. They had lost their spark and seemed to indicate that Catherine had lost hope, the very thing that had saw her through tough times.  
  
Grissom knew that he had to help her find that hope again before he lost her forever. He could not bear to lose this woman, the person who meant so much to him. She was more than just a friend. She was the one that was always there for him and they had been through so much together.  
  
They were what you would call soulmates, knowing and understanding each other so intimately, more intimately than most married couples. It was this closeness that Eddie had not understood and had argued with Catherine about it on more than one occasion. He just could not believe that they were just platonic friends. He was not the only one. Grissom knew that many in the lab questioned their relationship but he felt no need to explain to them.  
  
'Why are you here Grissom?' Catherine asked wearily as they sat in her living room.  
  
'I just thought you that you might need a friend.'  
  
'Ha, I thought that I wasn't worthy of that anymore. Where have you been these past few months? I needed you and you kept pushing me away!' Catherine yelled before bursting into tears.  
  
Grissom knew that she was right. He had been pushing her away. That was because he couldn't bring himself to tell her about his medical condition, the one that could end his career. He could not risk being close to her as he knew that she would find out and he wanted to tell her himself and not let her discover the horrifying truth for herself. But he was not ready to tell her. He knew that she would be sad and worry about him. He did not want her to worry.  
  
The thing that Grissom had not realized was how much he had hurt his friend until today. Grissom was angry with himself when he saw how distraught Catherine was. Even when Eddie died, he kept away even though he knew, unlike the others, how much Eddie's death had affected her. He had assumed that Catherine would be able to get over it, like she always did.  
  
The explosion at the lab however, had lifted part of the blindfold from Grissom's eyes. He knew that Catherine was not coping very well. She had been successful in pretending to be her normal cheerful self but her work performance had been slipping recently. This was not the Catherine he knew.  
  
That was when Grissom knew he could not put it off any longer. He needed to see her. To let her know that he would always be there for her. He would not push her away again. He would do anything to prevent anything that might pull them apart. They needed each other like the air that they breathe.  
  
Grissom pulled the still sobbing Catherine into his arms and let her cry. He held her close and told her, 'Remember this Catherine, from now on, no matter what happens, I will always be here for you.' 


End file.
